Dont Leave Me Alone
by Xiaolang's Ying Fa
Summary: New Years Fic! Yaoi Kaijou major. A must read if you like KaibaJounouchi pairing! If you like my other fics you'll love this one. An odd twist I've never done before! Enjoy the New Years, minna!
1. Dont Leave Me Alone

Xiaolang's Ying Fa: Konnichiwa!! Happy New Years minna! Here's a reprint of my New Years fic from last year, hope you all who never read this, read it this time round!

CAN YOU BELIEVE ITS BEEN A YEAR?!?! Wow...

Pairing: Kaijou major, no other people in it.

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: Yaoi content, if you don't like it then get out! Strong language, references to child molestation and child abuse.

Disclaimer: I don't own Yuugi-ou, I only own the plot.

It is in my own opinion that Katsuya is half American and half Japanese, therefore the last name of his father would be Jounouchi and his mother's last name is XshuddersX Wheeler. Its just my opinion so, if you want to use it in your thoughts or fics or whatever ish fine…Since he's a blond ya know, and Japanese people aren't blond…Besides, I like his accent a little more every time I hear it! Although it also makes me want to throw things at the screen every time Yugioh is on…Hm…

XxX

XxXJounouchi's POVXxX

I sigh as I continue my journey through the park. It's not unusually cold out, and all I have is my thin green jacket on. I sigh again, watching my breath fan out in puffs of white air in front of me. This is crazy, its New Years Eve and I've got nowhere to go. I shiver lightly, what time was it any way? I turn around to look at the clock tower at the top of the tall Domino high school building. Almost midnight. About eleven thirty. I suppose I could always go over to one of my friend's houses…Yuugi an' Yami? Nah, it's their first New Years together since Yami got a body of his own…Same with all the yami hikari pairings…I don't even want to think about goin' over to Ryou's or Malik's house at this time of night…Honda? Out of town with Otogi for the Christmas and New Years holidays…Mom wont let me within a mile of Shizuka durin' the holidays…I could always go over to Kaiba's house…He and I have warmed up to each other during the past couple of years…But we still fight every once in a while. I think we both need those once-in-a-while fights…it helps us keep our sanity…As I was sayin' I could always go over to his house…but…I wouldn't want to be puttin' him out…He doesn't deserve a mutt on his front step right on the eve of New Years. He's got Mokuba after all. Besides, he made it quite clear he didn't like me or even want me when I asked him out a couple months ago. Surprised? Nobody really was. I certainly wasn't. I mean…he's Kaiba Seto…He's absolutely perfect. I wasn't even surprised to find out my fondness of him was even deeper than a simple crush. Took all my nerve just to ask him out. And he declined my offer as sweetly and with as much courtesy he could muster. Broke my heart that day…But our bond only grew stronger. He knew I at least liked him, and he didn't ever mention it, or insult me about it. I think that's what made me fall even more in love with him. Surprised? I wasn't. I know I love him. That…I've always loved him. And I always will. We…don't talk as much as he does with Mokuba…but that's to be expected. After all this, I think I'm the only one that can get him to crack a smile. Besides Mokuba that is. I'm the only one he talks to at school…He wont talk to Yami or Yuugi despite how many times they've tried to start a friendly conversation with him. I think somewhere deep down he still holds a grudge against them from Duelist Kingdom and Battle City…But not on me. And somewhere deep down…I think he may have liked me back sometime long ago…I shake my head at my antics. What am I thinking? I can't keep dwelling on this, its New Years Eve! I should be out with my family having a beer or wine like every other normal kid out there. But I'm not. And it ain't nobody's fault about it either. Not my fault, not my mother's, not my father's, and especially not his. So I'm forced to wonder the street, no big deal, I've done it before in colder weather and wearing less. Not a big deal, it just breaks my heart even more each time. Breaks my heart to know I don't have a family that cares…but then, neither does he. He survived only because of Mokuba…but I don't have anyone…not even Shizuka left to comfort me…I sigh, life sure bites.

"Jounouchi?" I turn at my sur name being called.

"Oh, hi Kaiba," I answer.

"Jounouchi what are you doing out here?" you ask. Do you really want to know? I laugh slightly, and decide not to answer. Your eyes soften and begin to look concerned for me. "Jounouchi, what are you doing out here?" you ask again, a bit more strongly than before. I chuckle in irony.

"Had a dream about you. My dad kicked me out. That was this morning." I chuckle again at my own shitty life. "Said not to come back until I've fucked a chick raw and gotten the poor girl pregnant." My eyes never meet yours as I sit down on a park bench, staring out at the lake beside the school. I lift my leg up onto the bench and fold it Indian style while the other one bend up so my knee is against my chest. My clothes are freezing as I hug my leg closer. "Good riddance, he usually gets rip roaringly drunk on holidays anyways. Beat me silly last year." I knew I shouldn't have been telling you this. But…I just cant help it…I want someone to care so bad…The face so unemotional as I asked you to date me came back to haunt me. You simply stared at me as if I was crazy…and as if I was surely kidding…when you realized I was dead serious…the emotion…or lack thereof in your eyes was enough to jerk me out of reality and wish for a better life…I was shocked to see that same Kaiba sit down beside me on the bench.

"You've been out here the entire day? What did you eat?" you ask. Surely you know the answer to that question? I'm not as much of a pig as I make myself out to be at school. I'm not an idiot, not a loud mouth, not inconsiderate, not cocky…and you know that. You've seen the real me when I thought no one was looking…I'm not even hungry now. I wish you would just go away…I can't think straight when you're around. Breaks my heart even more when we're alone…I supposed you thought it was only a small crush…only a tiny infatuation sure to dissipate sooner or later…I'm sure you cant even comprehend that I _still_ feel this way for you…You could never understand my feelings for you…

It took me a moment to realize I was crying. And when I did it was only because your hand was on my face, wiping the tears away. I gasped lightly before ripping my face out of your hand. I turn the other way, so as to not see you. You sigh.

"You don't have to deal with this alone, puppy." I don't want to fight now…don't call me puppy. I growl lightly and you smirk. "C'mon, pup, I'll be your friend…just tell me what's on your mind." You don't want to know what's on my mind Kaiba…You really don't. I turn to you and smile my usual cocky smirk.

"Saa, what are _you_ doing out here?" You smirk back and tilt your head to the side arrogantly, your prominent jaw line sharply visible.

"Looking for you." I blanch.

"Are…you serious?" I ask, almost afraid to do so. You nod, the smirk disappearing.

"Yeah." I scoff lightly.

"Why were you looking for _me_?" I say, glaring slightly off to the side. "Don't you have better things to do?"

"Not when it comes to you." You say. "You're special." You say again with a grin to your words.

"I'm nothin' special to no one…" I say, my eyes filling with salty tears as I move farther away from you. You wrap your arm around my shoulders and pull me back.

"Now, now, whoever gave you that idea?" your sultry voice seems to be breaking me away from my depression. I turn my head away and weakly push at your chest. You simply take my hands in your one hand and hold them still. You pull me closer with the arm that's around my shoulders and I look away again, ashamed. "C'mon," you prod. "Tell me who gave you such a horrible and untrue idea…You can trust me, Jou…" I chuckle again at the irony. A hollow and empty laughter that was once so full of joy…Yeah, I used to be carefree…I wish I could say I still was.

"When I was born, my mother denied my birth date with a brutal velocity…Whenever one would ask me my birth date, I was forced to lie and say it was the 31st of December. My birthday is the first of the year. I was born right at midnight. My father thought it was so cool to have his first son born on the New Years…My mother became cold…she hated me because of it…I think it had something to do with the day her first boyfriend dumped her, or so I hear. My father told me I was special to have such an important birth date…My mother told me otherwise nearly a hundred times a day, if not more. She was a verbal abuser. She had been diagnosed and was on medication…but that didn't stop her from bitching me out. The day Shizuka was born was the end of me. I loved her so much…and because I loved my sister so much…mother took her away…but she needed a good reason. So she cheated on my father and waited for him to fall into unreachable grief and begin his drinking problem again. He did. It got serious. The first day he hit me, she laughed. The first day he hit Shizuka, she left…taking my baby sister away…and leaving me to deal with the monster she had created. The first day my father had tried to rape me…calling me by my mother's name, I called Shizuka, telling her to call the cops since that number was blocked from my phone…My mother took the phone from Shizu and laughed at me…telling me how worthless I really was. So you see, Kaiba, I'm not nothin' special to no one, and that's how it's always been. The day I was born has been a cursed day ever since the beginning."

"That doesn't mean shit to me, Jounouchi. You are special to me because of who you are…It doesn't matter what they think…Shizuka wouldn't tolerate you to be talking like this and neither will I." You whisper. I turn away from your piercing cerulean eyes…its not true…I'm nothing to nobody…and I never will amount to shit. Your hands curl around my upper arms, pulling my body to yours. "I know about your double lives…I know _you_, Katsuya. You are neither your mother's or your father's sur names. Jounouchi nor Wheeler, you are _you_ and that's just how I like you." Since when do you start talking to me this way? Since when do you _care_? Gods I'd give anything for you to care…I slowly let out a stuttering breath near your ear and you shudder.

"Kaiba…Stop this. Stop messing with me. Just let go and go away…I'm fine without your esteem speeches."

"It's the truth." You say as you move back, one of your hands sliding upward towards my face. You cup my cheek in your warm hand and smile lightly. Gods…it's so cold out here…

"Smile. Please, Katsuya? Smile for me please?" I frown despite his request.

"What's with you tonight, Kaiba?" I ask. "Why are you acting so odd? You never used to say this much to me before…" I say.

"Smile and I'll tell you." You prod. You smile and brush your thumb across my cheek causing me to blush and smile shyly. Your smile grows larger and I can't even hope to describe how handsome you look. "There you go…that wasn't so hard was it? And I'm not acting odd, I just don't think anybody should have to deal with this on their birthday…"

"Please, if this was Yuugi or Yami sitting here you'd laugh and walk away. Now, tell me the real reason." I say, smiling. Your eyes grow deep, sinking me into them, a light blush filling your cheeks.

"You mean a lot to me puppy. I couldn't just leave you sitting out here in the freezing cold with your tail between your legs, shivering." I slap your arm and you laugh. "Gomen, koinu. So, c'mon, lets get going." You stand up and face me expectantly. I look up into your glistening azure eyes in confusion.

"What?" I manage to ask. You roll your eyes at my stupidity.

"I said, c'mon, lets get going. Are you hard of hearing?" I look away, still not completely understanding.

"I've got nowhere to go…"

"I know that. We're going to my house pup." I blush. To hide myself from my embarrassment, I decide to ask another question.

"You still didn't tell me why you were looking for me. How did you know where to look? How did you know I wasn't home?"

"I went to your house." I flinch and turn away more so. "When your father told me he kicked you out I was scared. I didn't know where you could have been…then your father went on about how faggish you were…" My eyes fill with tears sharply, they fall over the border faster than they filled. I choke on a sob and my hand covers my mouth. I can't believe he said that to you…My gods…My eyes squeeze shut, but that doesn't prevent the tears from filling and falling. You sit beside me, I can tell because the bench creaked and you began to wrap your arms around me again. "…and when I stopped him by saying there was nothing wrong with that…he assumed you and I were…what we're not. He began ranting about the stuff he found in your notebooks and journals…and when he noticed my eye color…I presume, you call me 'blue-eyes' in your thoughts, do you not? …he began screaming obscenities about what he found in your books. Really though, if you have such a homophobic father, you shouldn't write down your fantasies about another guy." I began sobbing uncontrollably. I couldn't believe my father had found all my stuff…I had hid it all so well…he must have torn up my room…Gods…

You held me tighter, pressing your chest to my backside as I continued to cry. This is horrible…how could he do that?! You whisper in my ear, trying to calm me down, your hand comes up to smooth against my hair as you shushed me. I let out a soft whimper as you began to rock us back and forth.

"Why did you ask me out?" I freeze, my eyes wide. My body tenses and you squeeze me tighter to help loosen my rigid form. Your hands continue to rub me, keeping me warm.

"I…I like you." I answer. I can feel you shake your head at my back.

"No…its something deeper, isn't it?" your voice rumbles, the vibrations making me shudder.

"I love you…" I whisper. Your arms hold me tenderly, I can feel your chest extracting and retracting behind me…

"Hm…Did you call out my name while you were dreaming?" I stopped breathing for sure, my body again becoming rigid and tense.

"Kaiba!" I scream, my tears blurring my vision. "Don't mess with me!" You hold me tighter as I struggle to get away, the sobs wrack my body so hard I thought I would choke on them. Your head bents down, your hot moist breath flowing into my ear, your nose brushing lightly against my cheek and neck.

"Tell me, did you scream my name as I touched you? Did you cry out from the pleasure? Did you beg for more?" You're mocking me…You're fucking mocking me! With an amazing bout of strength, I shove your arms away from me and jump into a sitting position. Quickly standing, I bolt from the area, not getting far as your hand curls around my wrist, pulling me back down and against you. It's not the same! This isn't the same kind of fighting I can deal with! You're…You're mocking my sexuality…You're doing what I've never wanted you to do…you're making fun of my love for you…It isn't the same…stop doing this Kaiba…My eyes harden behind the tears as your hand trails down my front, rubbing my stomach and chest. I fight harder, desperately trying to get away from you. Why would you do this? First you're being sincere and offering me a place to stay when you damn well already knew I liked you, maybe even knew I loved you! And now your forcing me against you and touching me in places I never knew you'd ever…_Why_?

"Kaiba! Stop it! Please!" I struggle harder against you, finally able to break free only a bit. You use that to your advantage, you arm flies around my waist and spins me around to face you. Your eyes are so grave…so solemn and sad…hurt and swollen…

"Don't you want this?" you ask. My own eyes widen. What? Your hand reaches up and into my blond hair. I instantly shake my head.

"Not like this! Why are you doing this?!" I scream, hoping to get the answer out of you.

"All my life I've waited for someone like you…I've fallen in love with you Katsuya! And when you asked me to be your lover…I had to say no…All my life I've been raised to be homophobic and emotionless…and then you came along…With all your beauty and rambunctious personality…I beat myself up the whole time I felt something I wasn't supposed to…When you came to me and told me you felt the way I had…I couldn't believe it…I couldn't be with you…So after I said no, I thought you just dropped it…I thought your feelings couldn't ever be as deep…Today I learned…learned that you still like me…and then I learned that you've been in love with me as well…I…I don't know how to deal with this…I…don't know how to deal with all of these emotions…it's so different for me…" you whisper. Tears cascade down my face again and my mind goes numb, my heart swelling.

"You…You love me?" I am unable to comprehend that thought. Never had I thought you could ever feel the same…You nod and choke back a sob of your own.

"I love you Katsuya…"

"All this time…?"

"All this time…" You look away, your cerulean eyes deep, dark and filling with sad tears. "It's not right…This isn't right…We're…the same…"

"No. Don't think like that…It doesn't matter if we're both male…Not if we love each other…It will never matter…" Your eyes fill with tears and you hug me closer.

"I'm so sorry…I…almost hurt you…Gods…" your shoulders heave slightly with the force of the sob wracking your sturdy frame. I reach my hand up to cup the side of your face and push it back to face me.

"Hush. It's alright…All that matters is that we're here together, right?" I whisper. You look at me with such emotion, my whole body begins to quiver. Your eyes so hopeful and hesitant. I reach out to you, pulling you into my arms and holding you tight. Immediately I feel the shift of submission. Your aggression overpowering me in an instant. With your arms tightening possessively around me I can feel myself sinking deep into your warmth.

"I took your stuff." You say, your voice deep and husky in my ear. "Your father kept screaming about how he didn't want a homosexual for a son…I told him I'd take you away…and he started screaming again about how I couldn't take you away because…he had yet to beat you." Your voice is so sad, Seto…I can handle it…I've handled it before. "I took your stuff despite him…its all at my house…you're…not angry are you?" I shake my head.

"I'd be happy to stay with you…" I whisper.

"Forever?" my eyes widen and I lean back out to face you.

"F…Forever?" I ask. You nod and nuzzle my neck with your lips and nose. My eyes fill with tears again and I nod, hugging you tightly. "Forever…" I promise. The promise was sealed by our first kiss as you leaned back and pressed your lips to mine. Some say first kisses are done sloppily and nervously. This was none of that bull. Your lips were hot against my freezing cold ones…Your lips were so soft as you took the lead in this sacred dance. Your hands found my waist and held me safely as we kissed. This is it…I know we can do this. It really doesn't matter what any one else thinks…It only matters what we think…and if you love me and I love you…nothing else should matter, as it doesn't. Your mouth slowly breaks from mine, our lips sliding off each other timidly, letting the taste linger. Your hands tighten and I yelp lightly. Your eyes flash in apology.

"Are you alright? I'm sorry…" your fingers sift lightly against my shirt, against the tough bruises I've endured over the past couple of days. I nod.

"I'm fine and always will be." My eyes sparkle with hope as I whisper my next request. "Kiss me again…please…" you comply. Tilting your head to the side, this kiss is in every way different from the first. It was only slightly more demanding as your tongue touched against my closed lips softly. I opened my mouth in a silent answer to an unspoken question. Your hold on my waist tightened only lightly, not wanting to hurt me as our kiss became heated. Tongues meshing and rubbing, our hands in the other's hair and holding each other close. I could feel I was finally wanted somewhere…finally loved in a world that seemed to hate me or not understand me.

"Happy Birthday, love." You whisper right as the clock on the school chimes midnight. Colors burst out above the lake, signaling the beginning of another year. Another year I don't think either of us will fear or dread. Another year and many to come that are filled with the joy of the other's presence…The start of another year that neither of us will regret. As the fire works spring out and burst into beautiful colors of light, I reminisce on all that has happened tonight. The start of an awful day has turned into one I will never forget for all of my life…

You pull me into your arms as we stare out at the beautiful lights, kissing my cheek lightly, causing me to blush and smile shyly. You smile fondly at me.

"Thank you so much Seto…"

"I love you Katsuya…I love you so much…I'd never let anyone harm you…" You promise. I smile, the blush growing.

"I love you too…" I tuck my head under your chin and cuddle up to you. Suddenly…it's not so cold of a night anymore…And I'm not shivering anymore…I swear I'll never forget this night…or the nights to come. Your arms wrap around my waist possessively and I cuddle tighter, my own arms wound snuggly around your upper waist.

Staring out into the sky with you at my side…how lucky can one guy get? I smile up at you and think; pretty lucky I guess…

XxX

Ying Fa: Some of the one line sentences are supposed to sound familiar, like the 'causing me to blush and smile shyly' thing was supposed to jar your memory to the other time that happened…And Jounouchi's birthday IS the first by the way! I know for sure! xsmilesx I thought this fic was a little weird, and it didn't go exactly how I wanted it too, its kinda of…true, in my own way, its like me wanting someone to love and save me from my shitty life…hm, oh well…but…Anyways, I hope you guys like it! It was my first try and kind of a new, Jounouchi/Kaiba friendship thing turning into romance thing…Gomen if it's odd! Happy holidays!

Tell me what you guys think of my first time trying a full 1st POV for a whole fic! Jounouchi's too! So tell me what you think. OOC? IC? Both?

The next chapter is just thanking people! So if you reviewed before and would like to know what I said, go ahead and look!


	2. Thanks!

_**REVIEWS! First off, I'd like to thank everyone who read this even if they didn't review! Thank you all and I hope you had a nice New Year! Happy '05!**_

**_Osiris-Lee:_** Thank you very much, I really enjoyed writing this fic as well! It was all sparkly eyed and all, wasn't it? I thought just the prettiness of it all was just one of the best things I've ever written. So, again, thank you!

**_Brittany3_**: Thanks!

**_Alostblackcat:_** I have to end all my fics with happiness! That's just how I am, be on the look out for my new fic, hopefully to come out soon, called What Lies Beyond the Surface—and although that one isn't as happy as all my others, it's a great read just like this one so…Thanks again for reviewing!

**_ColeyCarissa_**: GET OFF YUR ASS AND WRITE, GIRL! Naa, maa…for real though, okay? Thanks for the review, and yes, it pained my heart and many other limbs to use the name xshuddersx Wheeler…EW!

**_Masshiroi Inu Youkai_**: Yeah,I wasn't planning on continuing this fic, I mean, I don't see it going anywhere…it would get more stuck than Masquerade…xtwitchx Thanks for reading! I think it was beautiful too…tehe.

**_Amee-star_**: Yeah…I just can't seem to get Kaiba's attitude right, ya know? He's just difficult for me to write sometimes…and then, other times…Hehe, if you haven't already, go read my fic Tricky Treason, that, I think is a good display of Kaiba-ness, and be on the look out for my new fic hopefully to come out soon called What Lies Beyond the Surface. Thanks for reviewing!

**_Black Luna_**: Why wouldn't Gozaburo teach Kaiba to be homophobic? It seems pretty logical to me. Gozaburo didn't want Seto to believe in anything that wasn't…productive. And gay sex isn't productive in which, you cant have heirs out of it. So…if you see it that way…xshrugsx I just think Gozaburo's an ass, that's all. Tehe. Thanks for reviewing! Go read my fic Lies and Betrayal for more of that reality homophobe stuff!

**_JilliaDarkLightenda_**: Thanks for all the smilies! And thanks for the plushie! xhuggles her plushiex LOVE JOU-CHAN!!! Meow!

**_Santurion:_** Yeah, well,since I do so many POVs all the time,I thought it would be cool for me to try something different, ya know? And I was just wondering if he seemed too OOC, I base everything I know on other fanfics, I've never really sat down to watch a whole episode of Yuugi-ou without throwing _something_ at the screen -.- hehe…But thanks for reviewing! And I'm glad you liked OPaOPMT! I did too!

**_Yamisgal:_** Hehe, I like yur name, and thanks for reviewing!

**_HieiTheDarkGem_**: Thanks, I'm glad you liked it! Hope you like my other fics as well!

**_Aqua Angelz:_** Thanks! One of the best? xblushesx Naw, I don't think so! But thanks! What "kat" word? Do you mean Katsuya? Eh? Katsu means "To Win". And IC means In Character, OC means Original Character, and OOC means Out Of Character.

**_Dai Otenba_**: Hehe,you tow are weird…But thank you, and I'm glad you liked the fic, it means all that much when people start rolling around on the floor just because they liked it. Tehe. Thank you for reviewing!

**_Obiwanblue: _**Yesh it is! For both Kaiba and Jou-chan! Happy B-day Jou!

**_Misura_**: Misu-chan! Love you! You reviewed me! Thankies! Thank you for saying Kaiba was in character, I thought he was too! Meow! I've just been reading too many of them Jou's-dad-beats-him-fics,and soit got incorporated into this one…hehe, I'm trying to like him on a different approach now though! Kaiba kiss and make it all better! Always!

**_The one who possess Insanity:_** Thanks so much! I'm glad you liked it!

**_Draggy2:_** It was touching wasn't it? Makes me all warm inside! XD!

**_Youko-moon_**: Thanks! I didn't think it was OOC neither! And neither did Misu-chan! Yayness! Thanks for reviewing!

**_Laura_**: No, no chapter two, there's really no story behind this except what is there now…hehe, I have no brain to come up with any ideas to make this go any farther…sorry! But thank you for reviewing!

**_ChibiSmiles_**: Thank you very much! Amazing huh? I seem to be getting that a lot…hm…Well, thank you! And I'm glad you liked it so much you added it to your favs!

_**Well that's it, stay tuned for more fics by yours truly, Xiaolang's Ying Fa! Over and Out! Meow!**_


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